Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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