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  nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night

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• Wacks on, wacks off.

  Submitted by TheRuleBook on Aug 29, 10 at 10:09am

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• Fortune cookie said: "Confusious say, you think wank good, but you just fucking yourself"

  Submitted by CheezeDetector on Aug 29, 10 at 11:48am

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• Wait. Someone else was doing that in Miami last night. I thought I had to be the only one.

  Submitted by blamblam on Aug 29, 10 at 10:26am

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• Hopefully both these events occurred at home and not in the restaurant...

  Submitted by missinsanity on Aug 29, 10 at 10:26am

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• who ordered the cream of sumyungi??

  Submitted by medic52 on Aug 29, 10 at 11:44am

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• I sure as he'll did the masturbating part, every night in fact with different food

  Submitted by giantone on Aug 29, 10 at 5:14pm

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• Do Chinese ppl have small penises?

  Submitted by JenForReals on Aug 29, 10 at 12:20pm

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• The chinese and their magic...now that they cant find their penises they must control others...

  Submitted by ThatCoolKid on Aug 29, 10 at 11:24am

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• I bet wanton was on the order..

  Submitted by damn_gurl on Aug 29, 10 at 10:01am

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• Sunday must be KFC and going lefty. Variety is good.

  Submitted by Taki on Aug 30, 10 at 3:10am

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• Don't the chopsticks leave splinters?

  Submitted by evolwayz on Aug 29, 10 at 3:38pm

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• Nothing like a spinner on saturday night to cap things off.

  Submitted by ouzo1000 on Aug 31, 10 at 11:24pm

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• Indeed

  Submitted by cheesewhiz on Aug 29, 10 at 9:54am

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• I did the masturbating part

  Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 10 at 9:55am

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• Hello Summer.

  Submitted by regalbeagle on Aug 29, 10 at 10:04am

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• Hahaha that's some funny shit

  Submitted by 4N0N on Aug 29, 10 at 11:38am

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• You should have paid the extra 20 bucks for the happy ending ass whole

  Submitted by vientiane007 on Aug 30, 10 at 12:31am

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• You're my new best friend.

  Submitted by stefanivitelli on Sep 3, 10 at 1:59pm

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• Fail.

  Submitted by PercivalJenkins on Aug 29, 10 at 12:26pm

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• Confucius Say: A penis has a hole in the end so men can be open minded.

  Submitted by BigBoy13 on Feb 15, 11 at 4:49pm

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• 10.26 wins. I pictured sender beating off into the egg drop soup on the Chinese buffet.

  Submitted by mjo on Aug 29, 10 at 10:55am

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• Ass whole lol

  Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 10 at 3:48pm

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• This shit screams you need a life.

  Submitted by BigBoy13 on Feb 15, 11 at 4:47pm

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• Wtf yo

  Submitted by kaelan on Dec 14, 10 at 12:46pm

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• Who the hell would you text this to?

  Submitted by Clint1989 on Aug 31, 10 at 8:36pm

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