If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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