she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
