The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
