i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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