well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
