yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
