I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
