So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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