Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
