What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
