are you so shy because you have an std?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
