You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
