dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
