my soul wont recognize me after tonight
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
