there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
