i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
