dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
