i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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