It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
