Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I want her autograph on my taint
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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