so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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