Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
