I don't think brook has ever known best
Its about making memories worth repressing
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
