Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
