So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize