I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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