The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Randomize