There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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