I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize
