YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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