Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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