It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
