wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
