THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize