but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize