Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
