her vagine was all disorganized.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Randomize
