so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
