You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
...so i touched it.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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