let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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