So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
