Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
