Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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