I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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