i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
