Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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