with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
tell me about the fingering
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
