just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
my nose is crying tears of wow.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
