Your mouth is God's brothel.
We got so high we made milksteak
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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